SIRIUS BLACK!

It has just hit me today that its time to get serious, get focused and know what I should and should not do.
It is my last year of high school, LEAVERS 2012.
The oldest batch in the school. The "Role models" as how teachers always are in favour of saying just to either inspire us or to make us feel so ashamed of ourselves.

316 days away from graduating not only from buildings but also life stages. From a tiny old brick building to something greater and massive. From mucking around in life to working hard and striving.

This year I know for sure that I would be changed. For the better or worse, my decisions will be where things would bring me.

I use to be that girl that had always pretended to be Liang Popo. I use to be that girl that would love Thomas the tank engine. I use to be that girl that loved the playground so dearly (Well yeah, I still love it.). I use to be that girl that loved collecting stickers. I use to be that girl who would suck up to the teachers. I use to be that girl that would do long jumps just to show off (I was a tom boy...). I use to be that girl that played detectives with my friends. I use to be that girl that would skip school. I use to be that girl that would cut my hair short and see how far I could push the teachers until they force me to tie my hair up. I use to be that girl that would shorten my skirt. I use to be that girl who would buy the latest brands and I use to be that girl who has given up on herself, her future and her life.

But we all learn. We all grow. We learn things that no one ever prepared us for. But the greatest thing I've ever learnt is that even though people around you have given up on you, even though you wallow in self pity to remind yourself of the hatred spark that you are useless and hopeless and even though you tell yourself how everyone is against you and the world wouldn't care if you existed or not and felt you should just kick yourself out... Funnily, God wouldn't give up until you realise your worth.. I've asked Him to give up countless times, could have blamed every negative on Him but positives are credits to "luck" but He was what I need to fully understand who I am. Making Him your vision would completely change your life. Well, it sure did to mine.

dreams into realities

If I told you my dream, would you tell me that I'm mad? Or would you see this person, that even I myself don't understand just yet?

JEREMIAH 29:11-14

His plans for me that He reveals,
Scary, adventurous and yet... So real.
The passions, desires and longing to be even closer to Him screams.

He knows my heart so well, the intensity of wanting to have thrills, adventure, missions to fulfil and He blesses me with dreams that would glorify Him and satisfying my humane crave at the same time. I never knew... I never knew who I would be, who I am and things that I long to do would ever be at this point. I see so clear, who You have moulded me to be. Though I don't see the whole picture of Your infinite plans that You have in store for me wrapped in amazing surprises just yet but now, the things You reveal to me just really, I can't help but keep falling in love with You over and over as you "Remind me who I am".

40 Hour Famine Journey: THE BIGGEST WEEKEND.

Issues:

1. Went to help out at the garage on Saturday morning. Honestly, every one's lunch smelt so good. SO DAMN GOOD. But because I knew I was going to have to face these little challenges, I wrote on my hand to prepare myself. "Knowing who you're fighting for." That kept me going, smiling and I prayed. Really, Daddy filled my tum tum. I didn't have problems or temptations to eat because I was filled. Filled by Daddy.

2. I was worrying that I won't hit my goal really. I was at 338 bucks the last time. I committed everything into Daddy's hands. Prayed for generous hearts cause Clare told me her last encounter with door-to-door asking she only got $9. Guess how much I got from people I don't even know? $55.

3. I was still nervous for door-to-door since I was alone. I prayed for maybe a Christian neighbour with a sign of a bumper sticker or a cross on the door or just something so I have more confidence. The next house didn't have such, I saw a huge group of people gathering and loads of kids in the hall playing. Something drove my hand to knock loads of times. A little boy opened the door. He looks exactly like someone I knew but I wasn't sure. I asked for his parents. Guess who were they. They were the parents who knew me pretty well because I look after their little son in bub's street (baby Sunday school) and they were having their weekly cell group I never knew existed in my neighbourhood.

4. I don't get why people can't give a complete whole number like 5 or 10. Like $4 you just need $1 more to have a whole number... But you know, like one neighbour gave $2 the next gave $3. Another time. One gave $6 and the next one gave $4 to complete it. Amazing!

5. By Saturday night I only had $393. I only had 7 receipts left before I need to get a new book if needed. Sunday came, prayed asked around. In 10 mins, 7 receipts, $140.

6. I wanted to beat my friend, that was my new goal once my own goal was met. $3 to! && some funds came in from church friends back in sg and some more who promised too! :D

40 Hour Famine Journey: Day 8 & 9

Just thought I'd like you to know...

Didn't do anything anything yesterday cause I couldn't walk so I didn't go to school. Went for NDP thingo with ocf peeps at Xm and David's crib last night. && Today, catch up with homework and all.

Maybe tomorrow? :)

at least a few please?

40 Hour Famine Journey: Day 5, 6 & 7

I was nearly losing motivation on days 5 and 6 because I was getting drained from rowing, tests etc but then again, "The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge." Then Joel my SA brother showed me a video that reminded me on what I am fighting for.

Something I did for dad's new toy. Digital photo frame!

My journey then continues tomorrow.

40 Hour Famine Journey: Day 3 & 4.

I so want to read this book.
The person who "remained annonymous" made me smile to myself cause it was a mystery but now that I know... I'm smiling even more!

40 Hour Famine Journey: Day 2.

Got up to 33% of goal.

I really want to thank the donors for being so generous and to continue giving me hope.

&& those who helped pass it on because awareness is better than ignorance. :)

40 Hour Famine Journey: Day 1.

I got my booklet today, I've set up my web page, I screamed all over the Internet. I'm pumped.

Little steps of Daddy's angels placing such passion and love in people's heart. Would you reach out and help? :) I've decided to update each day until the day I finish my 40 hour. The short journey ahead, filled with joy, some rejection and most importantly, Daddy's work in progress.

http://40hf.com/littlefootstepsofmarilyn